im excited about going on vacation with my boyfriend in like 9 days but im also very not excited that the doctors have said my grandfather will probably die in the next 2 weeks so im pretty conflicted about that
my therapist today suggested wrapping up services and i ended up agreeing. we have one last session and then that's it. it's definitely bittersweet but we both agree i don't need services from her anymore and i'm definitely doing the best i've been in years. still, will be hard to say goodbye.
i feel conflicted about all the hours i've spent on this website and whether it was worth it or not. thousands of mafia games, hundreds of hours, and i have nothing to show it except a bunch of foggy memories that i'll never share with anyone.
while i was shouting at a computer screen over a meaningless game, i could've been spending time with my family members before they all passed away. it feels like i fell into a black hole, warm and comfortable and empty inside, only to climb out years later wondering what the f*ck i did with my life.
