I think it's pretty cool that all of you are writing about really personal topics that I'm sure a lot of people can relate to (@Ginga for example) so I'm inspired to start my own thread. Rather than spamming skype group chats with my thoughts, I thought I'd use this thread as my soapbox instead. Will be mostly more serious thoughts.
Just a placeholder for now until I have something to write about.
But instead, what happens is a shouting match where both sides don't try at all to understand each other and it really annoys me. The ORG community is especially bad with this because they can't handle different opinions from the overarching majority's. They end up just focusing on trying to "drag" the other side rather than even attempt to listen to the other side's points.
I know that I come off as arrogant and strong-headed, but I try my best to try to see every side before coming to a conclusion and I think it's important to be able to admit when you're wrong and change your opinion accordingly when new information comes up. But in order to do this, we need to be more considerate of the other side's opinions.
Yeah, I agree. Your post also made me think of something else. I made the same remarks in the EM Skype chat, but I find that a lot of people have trouble seeing two sides of an argument.
Oftentimes, people think that arguments are black and white with the other side being 100% wrong and you being 100% right when usually it's more of a grey patch. An analogy I like to make is the dress that everyone debated over a few years back. Link: https://goo.gl/M6NBvU. Everyone could only see one color: either Blue and Black or White and Gold. They physically couldn't see the other color and I find that politics has become really similar in that regard. People can't see the other side at all.
This goes both ways. Liberals can't understand why conservatives voted the way they did and they assume that it's because they're racist when it might not actually be the case. Conservatives think that liberals are going to ruin the country with their progressive policies. It's easy to simply classify people as being wrong because they're racist or don't know what they're talking about, but you usually need to go deeper to understand the other side. It's important to be able to put yourself in other people's shoes and analyze why they think a certain way. Maybe their parents are conservative, maybe they had a bad mayor who was liberal, etc.
The example you gave about people backing their friends without knowing the situation is quite interesting. I don't know about you, but often I see less of defending the friend and more of attacking the other side. But assuming what they were doing was actually defending though...
I wouldn't characterize it as real loyalty. You're truly loyal to a friend when you're trying to make them into a better person. If you're just encouraging them to be , you're either seeking their approval or you're one of these people that don't question things.
I now have a pretty long break (~ 40 days) and what inevitably happens during long periods of inactivity where I'm not preoccupied with school or work is that I turn to EM or other online games to pass the time.
Tbh, I kind of hate it. I always get the feeling of being unproductive and usually at some point (around a week into break), I become pretty unsatisfied with how little I'm doing and doing the same thing everyday. My sleep schedule becomes a mess; I become practically nocturnal and I eat at weird hours of the day.
I'm hoping that this break will be different and that I can find some other things to keep me busy so I feel less guilty about doing nothing. My resolution this break is to avoid the usual cycle and to spend more time with family and friends and learning more.
I find that a character trait that has really annoyed me in the past is blind loyalty. For me, I value loyalty, but I also find honesty extremely important. I'd rather have someone tell me that I'm being an asss than continue to support me doing something stupid or wrong. It always annoys me when people just jump into an argument and back up their friends without really knowing the situation. Oftentimes, the only people who a headstrong person will listen to are their friends. They're not going to listen to people not close to them telling them that they're being stupid; the only people they're going to listen to are people close to them.
What really annoys me is when people praise these actions and spin it as being "loyal" like it's a good thing. I think there's a fine line between loyalty and enabling shittyy behavior. I guess I'm just a really outspoken person so I've never really had problems with calling people out or w/e and it's also why I don't mind when others criticize me. I just wish more people did it because a lot of bad situations can be prevented or deescalated if other people spoke up.
[2017-12-13, 3:35:07 AM] Rob: well when I talk on EM [2017-12-13, 3:35:09 AM] Rob: i have my door like [2017-12-13, 3:35:10 AM] Rob: closed [2017-12-13, 3:35:11 AM] Rob: and locked [2017-12-13, 3:35:22 AM] Zeezo: omg em is like masturbation for you huh [2017-12-13, 3:35:25 AM] Rob: LMAO [2017-12-13, 3:35:27 AM] Tucker: LSDKAKFKSK
When I first joined the lobby, I sort of tried to appease everyone because I really wanted to be liked. I cared a lot about how other people perceived me and my reputation in the lobby. Survivor being a social game predicated on how other people feel about you also contributed to this.
At some point, I realized that I was being fake not only to other people, but to myself as well. It's going to be impossible to be liked by everyone. I ended up just becoming a lot more honest with how I felt about myself and how I felt about others. I think that alienated a lot of people because I have a lot of very strong opinions and because I have a lot of weaknesses that I no longer tried to hide.
I've been thinking a lot about how people present themselves both online and in real life. I feel like a lot of the time, there is pressure to act a certain way (ex: being humble, being non-confrontational, being fake nice, etc.). I definitely am a lot more likable irl because I try to mitigate my weaknesses and I'm just wondering if I'm just more fake irl or just more AIDS online or some combination of both.
I've gotten into a bad cycle of sleeping late and then waking up past noon and then being tired later at night so I take a nap which makes it hard for me to fall asleep so I sleep later.
It's been causing me to eat at random fuckking times in the morning.
School is a big part of my life, so I thought it would be fitting that it would be my first topic to write about. Hopefully, this can resonate with some of you as well.
One of the biggest problems that I've had throughout my academic career is that I tend to base my happiness on my academic achievements. If I do well on an exam, my mood is lifted; similarly, if I do poorly, I become pretty sad and find it difficult to be productive.
I also am a pretty competitive person so it's often hard for me to not compare myself to others, especially in academics. What I've had to learn is that there are always going to be people smarter than you, doing all these crazy things. I've found that the times which I've been least happy with myself or least confident have been the times where I look at other people's achievements and try to compare myself to them. I think that in high school and in college, you have a lot of pressure to do well in school, to do well on standardized tests, to get internships, etc. and it's sort of ingrained in your head that you need to be doing these things or you're falling behind. What I've found is that the very people who I admire are going through the same thought process that I am; they're looking at other people who are doing even crazier things than them. It's like a food-chain where literally no one is at the top and it's pretty counterproductive to be comparing yourself to others because you're never going to be satisfied.
I guess I've come to realize that I need to sort of forge my own path and to focus more on myself rather than other people and that at the end of the day, academics do not really determine who you are as a person.
