nipples

i lov u aoba

WHATS WRONG MY CHILD IM RIGHT HERE SHHHH

i miss you

there she is miss america

helo this is formerly epicmafia user yomikohimesama

shut up

that was actually the 25th u wiener

sixteenth

ewwwww you have cooties

what the *** lacey youre married to me

"in love with Toripu" idk u tell me

hi r we in luv?

can you marry me

THIS HAPPENED ABOUT 15 MINUTES AGO AND HE HASN'T SAID ANYTHING TO ME YET. I'M STILL IN MY ROOM TRYING TO GET THE GOD DAMN FUCKING OLD SPICE OUT OF MY COCK. WHAT SHOULD I DO?

NOW MY EYES ARE WATERING FROM THE PAIN OF THE DEODORANT INSIDE MY COCK BUT I MANAGE TO PUNCH ONE OF MY SPEAKERS HARD ENOUGH SO THEY TURN OFF. I LOOKED DOWN AND NOTICED BLOOD DRIPPING OFF OF MY COCK; I GUESS THE LIP OF THE PLASTIC DEODORANT THING BIT INTO MY FORESKIN AS IT CONNECTED WITH MY COCK. THE BLOOD WAS DRIPPING DOWN MY LEG. THIS ALL HAPPENED IN THE SPACE OF MAYBE 6 SECONDS. IT MAY SEEM BAD BUT IT GETS WORSE. JUST AS I'M STANDING THERE TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED, MY BEDROOM DOOR FUCKING OPENS. MY DAD WAS STANDING THERE WITH MY ACCEPTANCE LETTER TO JOHNS HOPKINS. I FROZE AND HE STARED AT ME, NAKED WITH MY BLOODY ERECTION FOR MAYBE 15 SECONDS BEFORE HE NOTICED MY COMPUTER MONITOR AND THE BRUTAL ANAL SEX SCENE GOING ON FULL-SCREEN. HE IMMEDIATELY CLOSED THE DOOR AND LEFT WITHOUT SAYING ANYTHING. THIS MAY SEEM EMBARRASSING BUT MY DAD IS A SERIOUSLY CONSERVATIVE CHRISTIAN.

MOTHERFUCKING SHIT. I WAS JUST MASTURBATING AND EVERYTHING WAS GOING GREAT. I WAS IN MY ROOM, I HAD MY HEADPHONES ON, I WAS TOTALLY NAKED SITTING AT MY COMPUTER FAPPING AWAY TO A VIDEO ON REDTUBE. ALL OF A SUDDEN THERE'S THIS REALLY SHARP PAIN IN MY DICK, LIKE IT JUST GOT STABBED WITH A SEWING NEEDLE. I JERKED MY HAND BACK AND IT BUMPED INTO MY COMPUTER TOWER, WHICH SITS ON THE DESK. WELL, I HAD MY STICK OF DEODORANT ON TOP OF THE TOWER, AND THAT BITCH FELL OFF AND LANDED DEODORANT-END-DOWN ON THE HEAD OF MY COCK. HOLY FUCKING SHIT DID THAT HURT, AND ON TOP OF THAT IT HIT SO HARD THAT IT ACTUALLY FORCED SOME DEODORANT INTO MY URETHRA. I'VE NEVER HAD ANYTHING BURN SO BAD IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. I JUMPED OUT OF MY FUCKING CHAIR AND STOOD UP BECAUSE IT HURT SO BAD; THIS CAUSED MY HEADPHONE CABLE TO GET YANKED OUT OF MY SPEAKERS, WHICH CAUSED "OH YEAH BABY COME DEEP IN MY TIGHT TEEN ASSHOLE UH UH UH" TO GET BLARED THROUGH MY FUCKING HOUSE AND ALMOST MAXIMUM VOLUME.

I'm going to call the cyberpolice on you. You dun goofed.

Don't watch an anime called Boku. I was talking to one of my white friends and he sent me 3 videos with the name only labeled “Boku” I said to this dude, What’s this sh*t? He just giggled and said “Just watch them and MAKE SURE NOBODY IS AROUND YOU WHEN WATCHING IT!” Then I thought it was some weird porno or some strange sh*t but as I watched the first video, I was like “Yo…..what the fu*k..” THEN IT CONTINUED and I was like “Yoooooooooooooooooooooooo…….” THEN THEY GOT IN THE MOTHERfu*kING CAR AND THEN I SAID “YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!” I couldn’t fu*king believe what I just saw, It was like Satan gave me his porno collection, sh*t was so disturbing..YET I COULDN’T STOP WATCHING IT, THEN VIDEO TWO AND IT WAS TWO OF THEM…..THOSE NIGGAS…YOOOOOOO…….THOSE NIGGAS….AND THAT GIRL SAW THEM THEN SHE…YYYYYYYYYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO… THEN THAT NIGGA TOOK THAT DOG TOY THEN YYYYYYYYYYYYYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Do not fall in love with people like me. I will take you to b-ball courts, and professional b-ball courts, and b-ball courts in space, and welcome you to the jam in every beautiful place, so that you can never go back to them without tasting me like you’re taking it into over time. I will slam you in the most beautiful way possible. And when I leave you will finally understand, why it’s the space jam. Here’s your chance, do your dance. It’s the space jam. Alright.