you have about as much focus as a fly banging into a window. this causes you to do remarkably absent-minded things like forgetting to bring your ID to an airport. along with its inconveniences, it seems to muddle your motivations and make it more difficult for you to accomplish things. i do get a good chuckle at your expense though. at least you have been fighting the tide of such clumsiness and making progress mr. butler
i did not skip you impatient Scandinavian man. as someone from a secluded iceberg of a country, it is only natural that sometimes you come way out of left field with your opinions. i wouldn't call you passive aggressive exactly, but you're like passively antagonistic. perhaps it's often subtle trolling, but i think there's an obliviousness to it sometimes. at least you have the charisma to play it off
dan you are one fickle pickle. your heart is constantly swaying, and as a result your emotions and actions are never very consistent. one day dan is done with the website, 6 hours later nothing happened. your fickleness trickles into other aspects of your life seemingly too. at least your heart always means well you big sensitive emo
I'm the most self-important rooting tooting bad guy this website has
I think you take yourself less seriously than that actually. however, sometimes i think you're totally off your rocker. you remind me of russel crowe in that south park episode where he tries to fight everyone. that's you, combative for the sake of combativeness. there doesn't seem to always be a clear or consistent rationale besides dishing out some verbal ownage. at least your actual motivations seem quite more endearing than such behavior would suggest
pits is shivv? then i can double down on the suck here, which is that you both have tempers that put angry bulls to shame. one of you is more the caps spam rager, the other is a thesaurus thumping rager. both are unhealthy for blood pressure, and your prolific pasts of anger have put you at high risk. at least when you're chill, you're both approachable, and it seems lately neither of you has been all that angry.
obviously you suck for not being on the list. if you were on the list, i'd say you were an intelligent egyptian kid well beyond his years in wisdom and character. but since you are not, you are simply a kid with an unfortunate old people disease, which fairly sucks. at least you can get back on the list if your behavior remains well
you seem internet shy, so we never got to talk much. this is both why you suck and why i can't elaborate on how much you suck. at least you are a drinker, effectively boosting your level of sociableness every time you do so
you suck because you're too handsome for ransom. if anyone tried to abduct you, you'd completely unnerve them with your good looks before they ever put a hand on you. then, with the fighting spirit of wales, you'd send them flying to their graves off a high rooftop in seconds. don't you think that's an awfully extreme, vigilante approach to things? at least your beard makes you approachable enough to the lowly peasants such as myself